In context, it feels weird to even try to talk about anything other than my brother this week. A lot of the people who read this routinely will have already heard this by now, but this week Max was diagnosed with a brain tumor, that was then removed the very next day. I got a call from my parents while at work on Monday telling me, and at that point nobody really knew what it was. They wouldn’t even have found it except for that a routine eye doctor appointment discovered an anomaly in his optic nerve, located on the back of the brain, where a subsequent CAT scan discovered the tumor.
The very next day the doctors decided that it was best not to wait to remove it since they would have to eventually regardless. What was estimated to be a 4-10 hour surgery, as far as I could tell, ended up taking nearly 13 hours to finally get the tumor removed. But, after the surgery was over, the tumor was entirely removed, and all indications since have indicated that it was benign. Nonetheless, the recovery process from brain surgery is no small endeavor, and my heart breaks for the kid who is about to start college and finally leave his home town to now have to go through the grueling physical therapy and rehab process that now lies in front of him.
Still, what I have learned about Max from this is that he has an immense amount of inner strength, more than I think anyone, perhaps even him, was fully aware of. This whole process has been emotionally draining for our entire family, and I know that Max most of all should be the one impacted. I haven’t been able to talk directly to him since before his surgery, however every update my parents give me includes the caveat that he is joking around and maintaining high spirits through it all. I know he is having his moments of doubt, despair, and anger, as he rightfully deserves to be feeling, but over all of it, he is maintaining optimism. I cannot help but believe that he is doing that not only for himself, but also for everyone around him. Even going into his surgery, at which point I cannot imagine how terrified I would’ve felt personally, his last text in our family group chat was:
I know that for some people joking through things like this is a coping mechanism, and perhaps that’s what it is for Max too. Just as much, however, it seems to me that he’s doing it to let us all know he’s going to be okay, and it’s working. At this point it’s pretty much a certainty that after a recovery process it will be, but that wasn’t true before the surgery, and Max still chose to let us all know that it was going to be alright. Neither him nor I are the most religious, but if you doubt that that’s faith in something, I don’t know what to tell you. Max is still Max through crisis, and that is one of the most impressive character traits a person can have in my opinion.
Max, it might be weird to say I’m proud of you in this situation, but I really truly am. You are one of the strongest people I’ve met, even through a horrible thing that you didn’t deserve. Whatever it takes to recover, I know you’ve got it and that you can do it. Keep your head up no matter what comes at you, you’ve already showed that you can take pretty much anything, now it’s just the push through to the finish. I love you bud.
I also just want to quickly thank everyone for the thoughts, prayers, and support that you all have given to my family and I. Tough times tend to show you who is there for you when it matters, and I continue to be reaffirmed on how deeply meaningful each and every relationship in my life is. You all mean the world to me, so once again, thank you all.
The rest of my week feels pretty trivial in comparison, but I did get to go to Bozeman this weekend with my friend, and that was genuinely refreshing. I missed being in a place with other people, especially people my own age. It was a nice break from being the two lone people closing bars in our tiny little town, and a good reminder that civilization ain’t all that bad (even if Bozeman is also geographically beautiful, unlike most places back east).
I’ve also more or less closed on my next move in life, which will be moving in with one of my best friends down in Florida until I go back to school. I miss people too much to stay here for too much longer, so the next two and a half months I’ll just be saving up to make the trip down there. Hopefully I’ll still be able to do some cool stuff here before I leave, but regardless I can make the best of just living around all of this cool stuff I get to be in every day.
Song of the Week:
The Line 
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